Dead Drunk Guy

A man leaves a bar, gets into his car and drives away. 200 yards further he’s stopped by a police officer.
Officer: “Good evening sir. We’re testing drivers for drunken driving. Would you please blow into this machine?”
Man: “I`m sorry, I can’t do that. I have asthma. If I blow on that machine I will get out of air”.
Officer: “Please come along to the office and we can give you a blood test”.
Man: “I can’t do that. I have anemia and if you stick a needle in me I will bleed to death”.
Officer: “Then you’ll have to get out and walk 5 yards along this white line”.
Man: “Can’t do that either”.
Officer: “Why not?”
Man: “Because I’m dead drunk”.

Drunk Woman Can’t Get up!

The guy filming just made this that much funnier lol

Peeing in Public

Something tells me that it’s not that big of a deal for a man to get drunk and pee in public, whatever country that is..

Drunk Girl Falling off Pole

In her drunken state, this girl tries to pull out some moves on a strip pole only to face-plant into the ground lol

Penis Drawing on Drunk Guy’s Back X)

I don’t think there is even a need for a caption, the picture speaks for itself.. X)